Does makeup spark joy or insecurity?

lipsticksI enjoy listening the radio while I work.  Since I work from home most days, I get to listen to the station I love and crank it up loud!  But first thing in the morning they have more of a talk-show with a dash of music then later in the day switch to more music.  I love the morning show and the variety of people and opinions they have.  One in particular I can relate to as she is a curvy gal and discusses it and body-positivity a good bit.  There are plenty of things I don’t always agree with her on, however, and today I was a definitely torn on her discussion.  She mentioned that she wanted to come clean about how she felt like a liar for using her platform and saying she wore makeup for herself and not for others for several years now as part of her “love yourself” commentary.  She went on to say that she does in fact wear makeup to please others as she feels she gets a different reaction from people when she doesn’t wear makeup, but joked that she did not wear it for her husband.  Oddly enough, not long after that, a good friend was posting on FB that she couldn’t find any of her eye makeup as she just moved and was panicked that she was about to meet new ladies while attending her child’s school activities for Valentine’s Day.  Myself and several others tried to reassure her that she was beautiful without it as she was not one to wear it daily anyway.  In fact, I hardly ever saw her with makeup and she always seems so confident and and gorgeous to me!

All this got me thinking.  Were we all fooling ourselves?  Do we feel it necessary to wear makeup or do some of us really just enjoy it?  I certainly can’t speak for anyone but myself but I love putting makeup on and wear it everyday, whether I see people or not.  Again, most days I work from the comfort of home so it’s just me and the fur babies the majority of the day.  However, I will say I refuse to leave my house without any makeup on my face!  Even if I go to the gym, which legit is not much at this point, I always apply some mascara.  Not a full face, no foundation or cover up, just mascara to make me look like I am not asleep or the walking dead (the curse of fair skin and light hair with blue eyes).  Do I know one single person at the gym? Not unless you count my mom who has seen me in a hospital bed post c-section so she knows what it all really looks like.  Do I look like a troll in my workout clothes that are very unforgiving on my shape and get all sweaty and gross and splotchy?  Oh yeah…so why the mascara?  Is it because I think that swipe of color is going to somehow takeaway from the rest of the grossness post-workout?  I know I am blonde, but I really am not THAT dense.  I go workout with the knowledge I will look rough but I am there to improve how I feel about myself, not to impress the folks there that I may not ever see again and likely do not realize I even exist.  I swipe the mascara because I like it.  I don’t have to impress anyone BUT my husband who says I am beautiful with or without makeup (I know, he is so smart lol).

If anything, I feel that for me, makeup is not so much an armor as the radio gal said but a mood-adjuster.  I wear makeup when I am home alone because I like the way I feel with it on.  I sometimes feel insecure about a number of things and that brings down my confidence level, but because I leave my house in a nice outfit, my hair fixed, and of course makeup I feel ready to tackle things.  Which leads me to a great point, if you wear makeup to impress others are you also wearing nice clothes for others?  Do you comb your hair or even color it for others?  Do you wear your favorite perfume for others?  Do you wear jewelry for others?  For me, these are all a big fat no!  I do these things because I think showing I take pride in my appearance is a sign of who I am as a person.  I don’t completely have life figured out, but I was raised to act and look for the part you want but treat everyone you meet with respect and dignity.  I want to be successful, so I take time to look nice.  I am certainly not an expert on makeup application and not model material (not even for the curvy gals, I walk funny and am too silly).  And I color my hair because I was blonde the majority of my life then kids and hormones changed it to a dirty blonde and I just feel like a light blonde personality (it really is a state of mind just like my brunette friends are sultry and sassy)!  Now, if the occasion calls for it, I am fairly certain I could go to a meeting in my favorite pant suit with no makeup on my face and still handle it like a lady boss, but that’s because I know ultimately I am intelligent, I am brave, I deserve the best, and I go into all situations as prepared as humanly possible.

Now, I have loads of friends that never wear makeup and only own lip balm but they still take time to dress nice, even if it’s a good pair of jeans and a t-shirt.  These non-makeup-wearing friends also usually have their hair fixed, even if that means combed and straight.  Lots of friends who do or do not wear makeup wear jewelry to accent their mood and their outfit and last time I checked, a bracelet won’t add contour to your face and is it necessary to impress anyone?  I put perfume on because I like the smell, just like I put makeup on because I like it how makes my eyes pop!  My point is, most people have a series of things they do as part of their daily routine or some do certain things for special occasions only and all that matters to them, and to me, is if it makes US feel good, not everyone else.  If you work on the beauty you have inside that will shine on the outside every single time.  If you have self-doubt and feel bad about yourself for some reason, physical or otherwise, no amount of makeup will change your life.  Beauty truly is is the eye of the beholder and I feel beautiful even on the days I have less makeup on or have a breakout or I can keep going but you get it.  You have to FEEL beautiful before you can ever look beautiful.  I think to say you feel you must wear makeup for others is somehow actually more damaging than just wearing it.  Just like I feel that women who stress you shouldn’t wear makeup are showing their own negative opinion toward those who do.  I say do what makes you happy whether that includes makeup or not!  If you feel empowered by going nakey face DO IT!  If you feel empowered with a perfect winged liner and a bold lip DO IT!  And for the record, I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting to look pretty for my husband but even less wrong with wanting to look pretty for me.  Makeup does not define me as a person so I truly don’t feel I wear it for others anymore than why I shower everyday.  Most folks wouldn’t know if I did or didn’t shower but I still do it so I feel clean and fresh!  See, there’s me only caring about what I think again!  My gosh I am selfish!

So, do you wear makeup, or any beauty enhancers, for you or for others and why?  Do you feel folks that wear makeup daily are superficial, why or why not?  I would love to hear some other viewpoints on this since I am not the only voice of women.  Perhaps I misunderstand the thinking here.  I think some open dialogue may shed some light on why we feel the way we do!  And just know this, you do not NEED makeup, hair color, or fancy clothes to be beautiful, you already are, even if you don’t know it yet!

 

5 thoughts on “Does makeup spark joy or insecurity?

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